Lost & Guidance


Recently, I was on orchestra performances. I was exposed to a different world. I made some friends. Some of them are part-time musician, their career is not musician, but they never give up on music. In fact, they’ve put much effort and committed their times to balance their life between career, music, and family. They go far, they hold on to music, they let passion drive them through. I salute them!

So I look at myself. What I am doing now, everything is half-hearted. I am neither here nor there, just live my life through without passion. Suddenly, I feel myself so incompetent, my self-esteem drop. In other words, my expectation increases. Now I see a life of passion, I want to become like them also.

I thank God for all these exposures I had had recently.

In my journal, 6th March, I was questioning about my future. Hmm, a life in Starbucks is not too bad, simple and easy… I was lost. So I asked God to direct me. God heard my cry, and He gave me opportunities to have a glimpse into the world of engineering and music; in two weeks, I experienced both. God is truly nice to me =)

I enjoy both engineering and music. I will never give up on music, but I would like to continue in engineering too. So how? Ha, through my friends, God also showed me examples of how to balance both. Just go by faith, one step upon a time, never give up! I will be there eventually. What’s most important, is to remember my identity. 1 John 3 told me today, I am a child of God. I am becoming like Him. Having this hope in Him, I am purified, just as He is pure.

I don’t know how many times already, God has spoken to me through bible. His word is alive. How can everything be so coincident?  How can everything happened just like it is planned? Yes, God is behind all. Praise the Lord, who is my refuge!

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